A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence. He is allowed to say only two words every seven years.
After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. “Cold floors,” he says. They nod and
send him away.
Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, “Bad food.” They nod and send him away.
Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. “I quit,” he says.
“That’s not surprising,” the elders say. “You’ve done nothing but complain since you got here.”
After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. “Cold floors,” he says. They nod and
send him away.
Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, “Bad food.” They nod and send him away.
Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. “I quit,” he says.
“That’s not surprising,” the elders say. “You’ve done nothing but complain since you got here.”
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!”
Fuming, the woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down. She says to a man next to her, “The driver just insulted me!”
“That's awful!" the man replies. "You should go up there and tell him off. Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.''
Fuming, the woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down. She says to a man next to her, “The driver just insulted me!”
“That's awful!" the man replies. "You should go up there and tell him off. Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.''
A beagle goes to a telegram office, takes out a blank form, and writes, “Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof.”
The clerk examines the paper and politely tells the dog, “There are only nine words here. You could send another ‘Woof’ for the same price.”
“But,” the dog replies, “that would make no sense at all.”
The clerk examines the paper and politely tells the dog, “There are only nine words here. You could send another ‘Woof’ for the same price.”
“But,” the dog replies, “that would make no sense at all.”
I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out.